


No Matter What

by grace_aka_tiredchild



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, I Tried, I made myself sad, Idiots in Love, M/M, Sort Of, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch Needs a Hug, angst???, cursing, i would die for baz, penny is there for like three lines, poor babies, this is not good, uhhh DEATH
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:13:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27114503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grace_aka_tiredchild/pseuds/grace_aka_tiredchild
Summary: Simon is an idiotBaz needs a hugPenny is worriedaka. author wrote real angst for the first time and it broke her.
Relationships: Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch & Simon Snow, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Kudos: 10
Collections: Quote Prompt Memes





	No Matter What

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by [Background_Foxe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Background_Foxe/pseuds/Background_Foxe) in the [quoteonlyprompts](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/quoteonlyprompts) collection. 



> **Prompt:**
> 
> "What the hell were you thinking?! We could have died or at least been seriously maimed!"
> 
> "Oh. Did you enjoy yourself though?"
> 
> "Well, yes, but that is not the point!!"

P.O.V.: Baz  
Baz really wanted to push him off a bridge, or maybe yell at him for several hours. Honestly how the fuck was his boyfriend this dumb. He glared at Simon in the rearview mirror and sighed.  
“Baz I am sorry about all this.” Simon said quietly  
“That was so fucking stupid you idiot” Baz knew he was probably being unresonably harsh but honestly what did Simon expect when he went off and almost got himself blown up.  
He was about to start lecturing when his phone rang. He sighed and picked it up. Penny’s caller id (Annoyingly Smart) popped up on his screen. She was probably panicking about Simon.  
“Penny?”  
“Oh thank god, Baz is everything okay????”  
“Yeah everything is fine. I got Simon he's fine”  
“Are you sure?”  
“Yes and I’d let you talk to him but he looks so smug”  
“Ok, well I’ll yell at him later.”  
“Good plan, we’ll be back soon”  
“Okay love you Baz”  
He froze, even though Penny, Simon, and even Agatha said it all the time, he still panicked everytime it was said. He was trying to get better and not as fragile with it but it was so hard.  
While he had been monologing in his head, he hadn't noticed that Penny had hung up.  
“Was that Penny?” Simon asked  
“Yes,” Baz said shortly. He would never admit it but he was also still calming down from the emotional high of finding Simon. 

P.O.V.: Simon  
When they finally pulled up outside the flat Simon got out only once Baz had walked over to the stairs. He was worried about Baz. He had been so weirdly angry when he had come to find Simon tonight. Simon knew that he had scared Baz badly with the disappearing and then needing to be saved but it wasn't like he could help it. He had always sort of run headfirst into danger and so had Baz. But now he didn't have his magic to save him. 

Baz  
Baz groaned the second he got to the bathroom in the flat (no i'm not being weird) he slumped against the wall and pulled his knees into his chest. Stupid stupid Simon always trying to be the hero. It wasn't like Baz could blame him though, He had done the same thing more times than he could count. But still God damn him Baz knew he was being unreasonable but the tightness in his chest would not subside. His entire life he had been focused completely on Simon and the second that he didt the fucking idiot went and got hurt. He couldnt lie though, he had actually sort of...enjoyed needing to go and murder random goblins because his boyfriend was a dumbass. Not that he would EVER admit that to Simon because he would never ever hear the end of it.

Several hours later, after Penny had yelled at Simon for a solid twenty minutes, Baz was lying on their bed (he had essentially moved in a week or two after Penny and Simon had) and was waiting for Simon to come in so that he could sleep. He had gotten so used to having Simon next to him at all times that when he wasn't Baz couldn't sleep. Finally though, exhaustion won over and Baz fell asleep. 

*little like idk dream thing??*

Baz was walking- no running through a thicket of trees. He could hear screaming and the sound of animals fighting. He finally came to the fight and saw that all the other animals were fleeing. There was a shape huddled on the ground, completely still and unmoving. His breath caught in his throat choking him. “S-simon-” There was a soft sound from the lump on the ground and Baz ran to him. Baz choked as he pulled Simons wings away from his face, it was bloody and bruised, the rest of him was not much better. His breath was coming in shallow gasps.   
“Baz?”  
“Yeah love im right here”  
“I'm sorry”  
“What for angel??”  
“I should've told you where I was going and called you when stuff happen-” he broke off with a choked gasp.  
“Shhh Simon please-”  
Baz was crying now his shoulders shaking and his hands carding through Simon's hair.  
“Oh god Simon please”  
Simon's breath shook and he blinked werally up at Baz.   
“I love you Baz and I want you to be happy yeah??” his voice was little more than a whisper and it shook.  
“Shit Simon yeah- I love you too-” He cut himself off with a sharp breath before continuing “i love you so much and i want you to be happy too ok?”  
Simon smiled weakly at him as his eyes slipped shut-

Baz woke up crying.  
His hands were shaking and he couldn't breathe.  
Dead dead dead dea-you didnt do anything- fucking usless  
He knew he was spiralling but couldn't even manage to whisper a spell  
“-az Baz hey-” Simon was kneeling next to him on the bed looking worried. “Oh thank god- Baz what happened are you alright?”  
Baz choked out a no and Simon immediately wrapped his arms around him running his hands through his tangled hair  
“Shh love i've got you” Baz heard Simon say as he drifted in and out of focus. “Just breathe yeah? Focus on my heartbeat”

Finally Baz began to calm down and as he did so Simon released his death grip.  
“Jesus Baz you scared me- what happened?”  
“I had a nightmare”  
“About……”  
“You being an idiot as per usual”  
“You dreamt about me?? Why was it so bad?? I'm an idiot most of the time”  
“You- ugh- You DIED Simon”  
“...oh”  
“Yeah” Baz groaned and winced at his voice “Look, Si, what you did today was dumb as fuck but thats you, I’ve gotten so used to having you strong and with me that the second you werent i spiralled which is my fault-”  
“It's really not” Simon's voice cracked slightly and Baz looked over, he was crying.  
“Please don't cry love everything is okay now yeah?”  
“I guess so” Simon said laying his head down on baz’s chest  
“Honestly though, what the hell were you thinking??? You could've died or at least have been maimed!!!”   
“Yeah but did you enjoy yourself though??”  
“That is so NOT the point, but…...yes”

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed!!
> 
> This broke my heart to write but im actually proud of how it turned out!!
> 
> Comments and kudos are awesome if you feel like it <33333
> 
> also yes the title is from No Matter What by Calum Scott who is amazing and deserves love


End file.
